This is a personal story about losing my identity and how a good dress brought me back.
The last two years have been a bumpy road filled with fertility treatments, a miscarriage, my dog died, a career change, becoming my own boss, and basically following some dreams while trying to let others go.
While on the roller coaster of life, I managed to gain a lot of weight. Some from the numerous hormone shots, procedures, and operations that fertility treatments brought. Some from the disappointment when all those didn't get us what we longed for and other pounds were added from ice cream and laziness.
I realized in the last few months that I actually wasn't me anymore. I lived in black leggings and black knit dresses. I wore makeup maybe once a week. My hair was constantly in a top knot and it was a 50/50 shot whether I had showered that day. While these wouldn't send up red flags for most people (besides the showering ha), they were definitely signs for me that something was wrong. I've always loved makeup, hair, colorful outfits, long showers, and looking cute. I'm always telling girls to love the body they have right now and be confident about who they are, but I forgot to tell myself that.
So it's hard enough to realize you've lost who you are, but even harder to figure out how to get yourself back.
I decided I would make more effort in my appearance everyday and I would start exercising again. I run or walk at least 5 times a week, I shower everyday, I put on makeup, I put on cute dresses and colorful tights, and I brush my hair.
This didn't happen overnight, nor was it easy. I derailed a few times, cried about it, and tried again. I didn't realize it, but everyday I was feeling a little bit more like "me".
Today I was looking through my closet and I saw one of my favorite dresses. I hadn't worn it in at least a year. I had spotted it on occasion, but hadn't dared to try it on. Either because I was afraid it wouldn't fit or afraid to attract people's attention if it had. Well today I got the courage to put it on.
It zipped. I went to the mirror... It was a little tight and my hair was from the day before, but I smiled. I was happy with what I saw and that hadn't happened in awhile. This quirky dress with the drunk animals on it made me feel like me again!
I remembered the feeling I got when I made the perfect for me dress and how I wanted others to feel that happiness and confidence too!
The very reason I started Dear Yesterdays. ❤️